5 Weeks.

I ran down to the lab Christmas Eve for another blood test. My hCG was 268! Over double again! She's a fighter, I tell you! Maybe more than a fighter, she's just lazy and does things on her own time, haha. I would like to think that the low numbers correlate to her being an easy, laid back baby. She's not in a rush to do her thing. She's just happy hanging out, warm and comfy, letting her cozy bubble do all the work. Maybe after all we've been through to actually GET pregnant, God will bless us with a super easy pregnancy, delivery, and baby! Wishful thinking, yes?! Just let me live in that delusion, ok?! It's going to be fantastic.

Even though the numbers continue to rise, the doctor still used the words "cautiously optimistic." He would like to run one final blood test tomorrow morning. I will have to go up to Portland again for this one, because he also wants to keep me on the awful Progesterone oil shots. My body must be getting somewhat used to them though because my bum and legs haven't ached as bad as that very first dose, so although it's not a cake walk, it's certainly better than it was. He has me on these shots every other day now, but will drop me down to every 3rd day. Nurse Danny gave me one today, so my next one won't be until Sunday now. We're alternating cheeks at least, so that helps a little too ;)

If everything looks good on tomorrow's blood test results, then I should be all set to do our first fetal ultrasound the first full week of January...maybe the 6th or 7th. Although the waiting has seemed relentless at times, this overall process has really FLOWN by looking back. I mean, technically, I am 5 weeks pregnant today! When did that happen?! It's definitely a blessing in this moment to be able to say that. AND to say that I feel great so far! The cramping has ceased, no nausea yet (please, oh please stay that way) and my bloating is nearly gone! In fact, when I told the doctor yesterday that I felt great and my bloating was nearly non-existent, he was shocked! He said that being as responsive as I was to IVF, I may be one of the very few that just narrowly avoided OHSS and we walked the very fine line of OHSS misery and balancing the hormones just perfectly enough that I came out of this without experiencing the symptoms! Wow. Amazing. In fact, I feel so normal, that I'm struggling to connect to the fact that I'm technically pregnant. Not that I forget, but it still doesn't feel real yet. I've looked at baby things at every store and website I've been to, but I just can't bring myself to buy anything to celebrate this wee one just yet. A reserve. I know seeing that little flutter of a heartbeat on the ultrasound in a couple of weeks will help connect things emotionally for me. Things will click and it will become much more real for me - maybe that's the realist in me. I have faith God will give me the desires of my heart with this little babe, but seeing that heartbeat - that tangible evidence of LIFE, will connect the heartstrings I've been waiting for. Until then, more waiting of course!