Operation Baby Johnston: Week Four.

I just completed the first 3 weeks of hormones pills preparing my body for IVF. Other than feeling a little bloated here and there, I feel fantastic! In fact, I've even felt an elevated level of happiness the last couple of weeks. I'm not sure if that's coincidence or if the Progesterone had anything to do with it. I would like to live under the delusion, that instead of going "crazy" on the injections I will be starting soon, that maybe they would have the opposite effect and make me deliriously happy! Is that possible? Haha. Let's just roll with it :)

This week I will start Ortho-Cyclen (usually a birth control) for 3 weeks. Sounds odd, right? That's what I thought! Once the doctor explained that its task is to put my ovaries at rest - preventing my body from ovulating, it made total sense. He doesn't want me ovulating until my eggs are ready for HIM to retrieve, so this is how he manipulates the timing of it all. I've tried this birth control before, and it made me really sick and nauseous. Hopefully it will be a little easier on my stomach this time around. I only have to take it for 3 weeks, so I'm not too worried.

On November 9th, I start the injections. These are the 'big guns' as I have mentioned before. I'm not worried about these either. Do what you gotta do, right?! I plan on giving these injections to myself. Danny can help if he wants, but I have to give myself these at the same time every day, so I don't want to have to depend on another person to make sure we stay on track. Danny and I work pretty opposite schedules right now anyway, so it will just be easier if I put on my big girl panties and do it myself. We are going up to the doctor's office that morning, where they have a little 'injection clinic' to help me, so I'm sure their tips will be helpful. This as our path, This is my reality. I don't have a choice, so shut up and make it happen. Giving myself injections in the broad scheme of life - the big picture, really doesn't seem like that big of deal to me at all. I have a lot of cheerleaders too, so I'm in a good space. I'm excited to check another week off of the advent calendar!

I can do all things through Christ, who gives me strength! Philippians 4:13.

Operation Baby Johnston - Week 2.

Today is the beginning of week 2. I counted it out, and the entire process from the first hormone pill, until the embryos are transferred back into my uterus, is about 10 weeks; 12 weeks until I know if I'm pregnant or not, but 10 sounds a little better because now I have 9 weeks left and that's a single digit. Anyway, I have been on the hormone Estradiol for 1 week now. I think this is a hormone that is usually given to women going through menopause. From my understanding, he started me on this to balance everything out from my uterine surgery about 10 days ago - which I have fully recovered from, by the way. I don't know for sure on the hormone, maybe everyone going through IVF takes it...? I guess I should have asked more questions because to be honest, I'm not sure what its purpose is. Well anyway, I've been on it for a week now, and so far, I feel great - totally normal. Ok, so maybe a little more tired than usual, but that is it!

My goal through this entire process is to remain positive. It is such a blessing that we get to even travel this journey and I know there will be parts of it that will be rather unpleasant, but if I can focus on the fact that every step of the next 10 9 weeks brings us closer to a baby, then that IS my light at the end of the tunnel. I plan to be honest and real about the process, but I believe that whatever this journey throws at me, I can handle it if I have a beautiful, healthy baby at the end of it.

Pause. Rewind. Re-read that last sentence. What if this doesn't work? What if I put my body through this and I don't get pregnant? What if I do get pregnant and then I miscarry? How devastating! These are the fears I am struggling with. Negative "what ifs" - yes, but realistic fears any woman walking in my shoes might inevitably face. I have been praying continually for peace and the success of this on the very first round. I have been praying those fears can be dissolved because GOD IS BIGGER. I know many of my friends and family are praying for us because everyone has been so wonderful in telling me so! I am truly thankful for all of the kind words and encouragement! I am also thankful for those of you who have already walked this journey and have been open in talking about it with me. Thank you to those of you who have come forward and shared your experience and perspective with me - you have renewed my hope and excitement time and time again. Seeing your beautiful babies that were made possible by the modern day miracle of IVF, has given me the inspiration and desire to do this - one step at a time.

For those of you who aren't sure how to help or what to say, prayer is really the best support. Pray for the same things we are praying for: peace, patience, and success the first round! We pray that by this time next year, we will be completing Operation Baby Johnston and bringing home a beautiful, healthy baby (or 2)!

Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Operation Baby Johnston, Part One: COMPLETE

Last Friday morning, I went in for surgery on my uterus. If we're using big words here, it was a hysteroscopy with transection of the septum. In all honesty, I don't remember a thing - which is the beauty of anesthesia, I suppose. Before I woke back up, the doctor put a balloon in my uterus, to keep the walls of the uterus from collapsing on each other so it could heal properly. I can't really feel the balloon itself, I just feel bloated and a little uncomfortable. I was crampy off and on all weekend, but that was to be expected...nothing worse than cramps I have had before. They gave me Vicodin, but I only needed a few of those thank goodness because they made me a little loopy and itchy all over. Ibuprofen worked for the most part. I had never been under anesthesia before as this was my first surgery - so I really didn't know what to expect coming out of it. I ended up feeling so lethargic all weekend, as if I was moving in slow-motion and aware of it, but unable to do anything about it. It was weird. I was quieter than my usual self too, but that's because I think I was in a daze most of the time just staring off into space. I still feel tired, but my body is healing and making progress - less bleeding, less cramping. I am going up this afternoon to have the balloon removed. I spoke with the doctor this morning, and I will start taking Estrogen today so it starts plumping up my uterus. It's amazing they can manipulate the body into doing what it needs to do in preparing for this baby! Operation Baby Johnston, Part One: COMPLETE.

Danny, Ty, and I went up to Washington to visit Danny's dad, sister and family. We left Friday evening after my surgery. Luckily, I was able to sleep the whole drive. I feel bad I was probably not the best company all weekend, but they welcomed me with open arms, a Costco-sized bottle of Ibuprofen and a giant bag of maxi pads - haha!! This was the best 'welcome' ever! It was so good to see them! They live in Aberdeen and Danny grew up there, so he drove us all around and showed us his old stomping grounds. The weather was absolutely beautiful! We drove over to Ocean Shores on Saturday and then Sunday we went to a pumpkin patch! These gorgeous fall days spent with family made for such a perfect weekend. Thank you for having us and taking care of me - Dad, Nick, Jill, Taylor, and Cody!

Ocean Shores! A long stretch of beach you can drive right up on!


The boys had the whole go-cart track to themselves!


Pumpkin Patch!

Ty made a slimy friend with his cousin, Cody!